Swimming with the Feces
Discharging a boat’s holding tank improperly is illegal; unfortunately, it is also almost impossible to enforce.
By Lisa H. Knapp
Columnist
Being minutes away from the most beautiful coral reefs in the world and the best blue-water fishing in America gives South Florida’s waterways an illusion of being an
environmental nirvana. Regardless of whether the IntraCoastal Waterway (ICW) actually starts at the Annisquam River (north of Boston) or in Norfolk, Virginia (the ICW’s first, official
mile marker posting), there is no question as to where it ends. It ends here: at Miami’s final 1095.0-mile marker – and the ICW is far from pristine. No wonder this alluring inland
waterway is often called the “Ditch” in some circles.
Fuel and oil spills from vessels certainly cause their share of ICW pollution, and the color of the water is a telltale sign of contamination and stagnation. But the
worst ICW pollutant is also the most avoidable one: boat holding tanks that are … full of you know what.
Hey Dipstick: Don’t Dump in Our Ditch!
The 2002 U.S. Environmental Protection Agency’s National Health Protection Survey of Beaches (conducted in conjunction with the Broward County Health Department)
studied Hollywood North Beach InterCoastal Park’s pollution level. Official queries regarding the sources of pollution (in the vicinity of the beach) that might affect the beach concluded
that septic systems and boat discharges were the primary culprits.
Actually, it’s lazy, disgusting people that are the true culprits. Septic systems and boat holding tanks don’t just empty themselves without a human initiating the
process at some point along the way.
Water samples are collected at Hollywood Beach once every two weeks for analysis of bacterial densities. When bacterial testing results indicate that applicable
bacterial standards for beach water quality are exceeded, swimmers are advised of beach closings.
Discharging a boat’s holding tank improperly is illegal; unfortunately, it is also almost impossible to enforce. The laws clearly state that boat owners are not
allowed to discharge raw sewage on the ICW. But this law is violated rampantly by boaters too lazy to pump-out their tank for a nominal fee.
Pump-out facilities for small vessels are easy to find. The Hall of Fame Marina, 435 Seabreeze Blvd. in Ft. Lauderdale, has a new pump station to accommodate large,
crewed 100+ foot mega-yachts. With holding tanks up to 1000 gallons, additional costs apply (for moving that big humdinger from Point A to Point B… M). However, if you quibble about the
cost of pumping out the holding tank, you shouldn’t even own a yacht.
Another “elimination” option is to go three miles offshore, flip the switch and off-load your raw sewage into the Atlantic Ocean. (That is actually legal.) But
why would you poop in your own backyard? (There are alternatives.)
Have you ever noticed that the cleanest, bluest sections of the ICW appear to be concentrated adjacent to ocean inlets (i.e. Haulover Cut)? That’s because the
ocean’s current acts as one, big flush mechanism. And with that thought in mind, let’s pull the chain on this one – we’re all pooped out, now.
Miami de Brazil
Every day’s a fiesta at the new Miami de Brazil Latin American Steakhouse. The restaurant is located in Loehmann’s Plaza at 18955 Biscayne Blvd., the former site of
Perry’s.
Points North made a field trip to Miami de Brazil’s Grand Opening on Wednesday, September 24th, anxious to try the rodizios – huge, skewers
kabobbed with filet mignon, chicken wings, and other delicious BBQ specialties. The sizzling spear rodizios are brought to your table, where you’re served as much as you want – over and
over again. The restaurant’s menu is simple: fixed-prices, no-decisions – just relax and point or grunt at the food on the spear and it will appear on your plate.
A Kick in the Caipirinha
The signature drink of Miami de Brazil is the Caipirinha, pronounced ki-pea-ree-nha. It’s like a margarita, kicked up a Brazilian notch or two. Manager Jeff Priskie
says, “The atmosphere at Miami de Brazil is on fun – it’s a new concept compared to Perry’s. Miami de Brazil has no official closing time – we want to keep the atmosphere relaxed. This is
a place where you can party and have a great meal.”
The fixed-price menu also includes an all you can eat salad bar buffet, a pork roast carving station and a variety of other delicacies upon which to graze. Desserts
and beverages are a-la-carte. Lunch starts at $9.95 and is served from 11a.m. – 3 p.m. Supper’s on between 3 – 5 p.m. for $16.95 followed by Dinner at $19.95. Olé.
Learn by Living at the Sayan, Grasshopper
Famed Collins Drive high-rise architects Sieger-Suarez will add another landmark to their tall list of impressive condos. The Sayan Condominium has been approved by
the City of Sunny Isles, with an 18-month build-out commencing this December.
Already 80% sold-out, the Asian-inspired luxury condominium will be located at 16275 Collins, the former site of the Mandalay Hotel, which was razed in February.
Priced from the high $400’s – up to $3.8 million (for the posh, customized penthouses), the 30-story Sayan will have panoramic ocean and IntraCoastal views for 90 residences.
More good karma: Sayan is pet-friendly and will allow one pet (of any size or weight). So bring your pooch with the rest of your pack.
Feng Shui and Funky Sway
By definition, the Sayan is a Polynesian word that means “place of ultimate relaxation.” Inspired by the romance of Bali, Sayan’s concept was born of South Seas
folklore and modernized with exotic tropical hardwoods, bubbling fountains, and serene waterfalls.
According to Sayan spokesperson, Christie Lowey, “The Sayan will have a world-class spa complete with meditation gardens. The sales center will be open in October.
One unique aspect of the construction phase is the working stone-structure waterfall, which will hide building debris while giving a teaser of what’s to come.”
Architects Sieger and Suarez are renowned for their striking structures, including Pinnacle, Ocean I, II, and III, and Hidden Bay. The floor plans for Sayan include
an unusual, “see-through” north to south model. Building amenities also tout exotic Indonesian plantings, Balinese huts, wooden decks and bridges, outdoor massage tables and a four-story
entry lobby with a reflective pond and waterfall.
Later, Lisa
Lisa H. Knapp is an award-winning, advertising copywriter based in Aventura, Florida and can be contacted at the Sun Post or at Lisakevinknapp@aol.com.
