The following reviews were posted on 12.7.06

The Painted Veil ***

(Edward Norton, Naomi Watts, Liev Schreiber) Walter (Norton) and Kitty (Watts) are never in love, get married, she cheats, there’s a lot of hatred and spite, and then they fall in love for the first time. It may not be what you expect from a movie that takes place in 1920s China, but the story grows on you and Watts’ conflicted heroine is endearing. This is a moving, effective drama. Based on the W. Somerset Maugham novel. Rated PG-13.

Children of Men ***1/2

(Clive Owen, Julianne Moore, Michael Caine) In the year 2027, women are infertile and a disgruntled former activist (Owen) has given up hope for the future of mankind. Things change, however, when his former lover Julian (Moore) asks him to transport the miraculously pregnant Kee (Claire-Hope Ashitey) through a war zone to safety. Owen’s captivating performance drives the strong narrative along, and director Alfonso Cuaron’s (Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban) gloomy visual style perfectly accentuates the story of a dystopian future in desperate need of a glimmer of hope. Rated R.

Notes on a Scandal ***1/2

(Dame Judi Dench, Cate Blanchett, Billy Nighy) Pottery teacher Sheba (Blanchett) is blackmailed into an overbearing friendship with colleague Barbara (Dench) after Barbara learns she is having an affair with a 15 year-old student (Andrew Simpson). Dench is fiendishly awesome as the cunning and manipulative schoolmarm who offers comfort with very thick strings attached. And in what must be the most discomfiting role of her career, Blanchett handles Sheba with an uneasy quiet and ethereal beauty — we have sympathy for her even though we know what she’s doing is wrong. Rated R.

Perfume: The Story of a Murderer ***

(Ben Whishaw, Simon Chandler, Dustin Hoffman) In 18^th century Paris, a man (Whishaw) with an enhanced sense of smell tries to create the perfect perfume by killing women and capturing their scent. Imminently appealing with visual panache to spare, Patrick Suskind’s controversial novel has been given a spirited interpretation by director Tom Tykwer (Run, Lola, Run). But at 147 minutes it’s also a bit overwhelming, including the grand conclusion, which features an orgy that would put the porn industry to shame. Rated R.

Dreamgirls ****

(Jamie Foxx, Beyonce Knowles, Jennifer Hudson) Loosely based on the career of the Supremes, three girls (Knowles, Hudson and Tony winner Anika Noni Rose) from Detroit dream of a singing career and get their wish when they’re signed by manager Curtis Taylor Jr. (Foxx). Great songs, great acting and a wonderfully constructed story by writer/director Bill Condon make this the best musical since Chicago, and one of the best movies this year. Amid a cast with stars named Foxx, Eddie Murphy and Knowles, American Idol outcast Hudson steals the movie and America’s heart once again. This film will win many, many Oscars. Rated PG-13.

Night at the Museum **1/2

(Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Robin Williams) The new night watchman (Stiller) at the Museum of Natural History gets quite a surprise his first day on the job: the wax figures of Teddy Roosevelt (Williams), westerns tough guys (led by Wilson), various animals and more come to life thanks to an ancient Egyptian spell. It’s good, clean fun for kids, but parents will likely grow bored with the silly story. The best bet is to have the grandparents take them — screen legends Dick Van Dyke and Mickey Rooney are the lone highlights for adults. Rated PG.

The Good Shepherd **1/2

(Matt Damon, Alec Baldwin, Angelina Jolie) The history of the CIA is traced through the career of Edward Wilson (Damon), who was there when it was founded until the ill-fated Bay of Pigs invasion in 1961. The grand intentions are admirable, but director Robert De Niro (behind the camera for the first time since A Bronx Tale in 1993) never quite gets his arms around the sheer scope of Eric Roth’s script, which had been in development for at least ten years. A flat performance by Damon also doesn’t help, although he’s picked up by a solid ensemble cast. Rated R.

The Good German **

(George Clooney, Tobey Maguire, Cate Blanchett) American journalist Jake Geismer (Clooney) tries to get former lover Lena Brandt (Blanchett) out of post-World War II Berlin. Director Steven Soderbergh (Traffic) deserves credit for trying to make a traditional WWII movie with only the technology available in the 1940s, but unwelcome modernisms such as violence and vulgarity never allow the experiment to work. A convoluted script by Paul Attanasio (working from Joseph Kanon’s novel) seals the fate of this thoroughly mediocre project. Rated R.

Volver **

(Penelope Cruz, Carmen Maura, Lola Dueñas) Raimunda (Cruz) and her sister Sole (Dueñas) believe the spirit of their dead mother (Maura) lives on, especially after the death of their Aunt Paula (Chus Lampreave). There are many layers to writer/director Pedro Almodovar’s (Talk to Her, Bad Education) latest, but the story never finds the energy or coherence to match the devious cleverness to which it aspires. It’s as though someone has taken over the mind of Almodovar and put forth this lackluster, desperately uneventful film that’s redeemed only by Cruz’s enchanting performance. Rated R.

The History Boys **

(Richard Griffiths, Stephen Campbell Moore, Clive Merrison) Director Nicholas Hytner (The Crucible) and playwright Alan Bennett adapt this Broadway and West End hit for the big screen, but they never get far enough away from theatrical histrionics for the story to play well on film. The plot follows students at a British boarding school as they prepare to take college entrance exams with the hope of going to either Oxford or Cambridge. Some individual moments work, but on the whole the movie is somewhat immoral and not quite bold enough to say or do anything of consequence. Rated R.

We Are Marshall ***

(Matthew McConaughey, Matthew Fox, Anthony Mackie) Coach Jack Lengyel (McConaughey) tries to rebuild the University of Marshall football team after a fatal plane crash in November 1970 kills almost all of its coaches and players. Sports movies often beat us over the head with the idea that “winning isn’t everything,” but through the watchful and humble eye of McConaughey’s Coach Lengyel, the Marshall football program brings life and joy back to a hesitant community that lost far too many of its favorite sons. It’s an effective, moving film that works even for those who despise sports movies. Rated PG.

Rocky Balboa ***

(Sylvester Stallone, Burt Young, Antonio Tarver) With Adrian now deceased, Rocky (Stallone) runs a modest Italian restaurant in Philadelphia and tries to mend his relationship with his son (Milo Ventimiglia). He also has a nagging urge to fight again, and commits to an exhibition with the current champion (real-life boxer Tarver). Most of the film is a sentimental look down memory lane with a heavy dose of post-career malaise thrown into the mix, but it’s also well-written and warmly effective. Then the training montage begins and damn if you don’t find yourself chanting “Rocky! Rocky!” one last time. Rated PG.

Eragon *1/2

(Edward Speleers, John Malkovich, Jeremy Irons) After finding a spherical blue stone in the forest, Eragon’s (Speleers) life is changed forever after a dragon (voiced by Rachel Weisz) hatches from it and he becomes immersed in a war against the land’s evil king, Galbatorix (Malkovich). This cheap rip off of Star Wars and The Lord of the Rings has no ideas to call its own, worse acting (except for Irons) than an after-school special and visual effects that are a mere notch above those in Battlefield Earth. Rated PG.

Apocalypto ***1/2

(Rudy Youngblood, Dalia Hernandez, Raoul Trujillo) As the end of the ancient Mayan civilization draws near, Jaguar Paw (Youngblood) secures his wife (Hernandez) and young son (Carlos Emilio Baez) in a ditch before being captured by a rival tribe and taken to the gods to be sacrificed. This is a hyper-violent and captivating film from director Mel Gibson, who has succeeded in doing what many thought unthinkable: he’s made an action movie that’s also a period piece told in a foreign language, and has done so remarkably well. The film is a truly unique experience that you’ve probably never seen before and will likely never see again. Rated R.

The Holiday ****

(Cameron Diaz, Kate Winslet, Jude Law, Jack Black) Lovelorn career girls Amanda (Diaz) and Iris (Winslet) swap their respective homes in Los Angeles and England for two weeks in the hopes of getting as far away from men as possible. Something magical must have been in the air when they crossed the Atlantic, though, as Amanda is soon infatuated with Iris’ brother Graham (Law) and Iris finds comfort in an aging screenwriter (Eli Wallach) and kind composer (Black). This graceful, funny and warm romantic comedy is the best the genre has offered since “Love Actually” three years ago. The story takes place around Christmas time, and is so elegantly made that even the surliest scrooge is bound to leave the theater with a smile. Rated PG-13.

Blood Diamond ***

(Leonardo DiCaprio, Djimon Hounsou, Jennifer Connelly) The greed of the unscrupulous diamond trade in Africa is exposed as a smuggler (DiCaprio), local fisherman (Hounsou) and journalist (Connelly) trek deep into dangerous rebel territory to find a priceless diamond. It’s a bloated epic that mixes action and pathos reasonably well, and in doing so keeps you off-guard and interested. Connelly may be underused, but DiCaprio once again displays his incredible range by ably sporting a South African accent, and Hounsou finds passion and poignancy in a role that could’ve easily been one-dimensional. Rated R.

Turistas (No Stars)

(Josh Duhamel, Melissa George, Olivia Wilde) This vacation-gone-awry gore fest follows young and attractive twenty-somethings lost in the outskirts of Brazil who meet some not-so-nice locals. It’s an average slasher pic for the first hour, but then a gory scene of unthinkable, nausea-inducing discomfort ruins the little the movie had going for it. This is the first movie I’ve ever walked out on because it made me physically ill. Rated R.

The Nativity Story **

(Keisha Castle-Hughes, Oscar Isaac, Shohreh Aghdashloo) This faithful retelling of the birth of Jesus Christ follows Mary (Castle-Hughes) as she’s impregnated by the Holy Spirit and travels with Joseph (Isaac) to a little manger in Bethlehem. The story is given a Sunday school interpretation by director Catherine Hardwicke (“Thirteen”), whose film may appeal to the “Jesus Camp” crowd but offers little to anyone else. Arguably the most important birth in the history of mankind deserves better. Rated PG.

Deck the Halls *

(Matthew Broderick, Danny DeVito, Kristin Davis) Steven Finch’s (Broderick) status as “the Christmas guy” in his small Massachusetts town is challenged by new neighbor Buddy Hall (DeVito), an irrational jerk who’s trying to have his house seen from outer space. An unhealthy and unfunny competition ensues between the two, the likes of which is not even childish enough to be amusing. This is no Surviving Christmas (remember that Ben Affleck bomb?), but it does leave you with a lingering feeling of contempt. Rated PG.

For Your Consideration **

(Catherine O’Hara, Parker Posey, Eugene Levy) As the production of a World War II melodrama entitled “Home for Purim” begins to generate awards buzz, everyone from the ditzy producer (Jennifer Coolidge) to the clueless agent (Levy) is overcome with Oscar hysteria. The film has it moments, but co-writers Levy and Christopher Guest have led their company down much funnier paths (Waiting for Guffman, Best in Show), and never quite find a rhythm here. Anyone with high expectations will be substantially disappointed. Rated PG-13.

Bobby ****

(Martin Sheen, Helen Hunt, Anthony Hopkins) The goings-on at the Ambassador Hotel on June 4, 1968 — the day Robert F. Kennedy was assassinated — is the subject of writer/director Emilio Estevez’s touching and nostalgic look at this era in American history. By focusing on the people and only showing Kennedy’s face through archival footage, Estevez allows the beliefs that Kennedy stood for to resonate with the hope for a peaceful, prosperous America. Rated R.

The Fountain *

(Hugh Jackman, Rachel Weisz, Ellen Burstyn) From the director of Requiem for a Dream comes a story about eternal love, a mysterious fountain of youth, and a monkey with a brain tumor. Jackman and Weisz play lovers whose bond lasts for more than 1,000 years, but is never a happy one. For the first half hour absolutely nothing makes sense. For the next hour things take a vague shape, but you’ve stopped caring long ago and are just hoping for something interesting to happen. It doesn’t, so for the last six minutes of the 96-minute movie you desperately yearn for the credits to roll and end your misery. Rated PG-13.

Déjà Vu ***1/2

(Denzel Washington, Paula Patton, James Caviezel) After a devastating bomb kills hundreds of innocents on a New Orleans ferry, ATF (Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives) agent Doug Carlin (Washington) investigates. With the help of federal agents, his starts by tracing the actions of a dead woman (Patton) prior to the explosion, and becomes smitten with her in the process. He then learns he may be able to travel back in time to save her. Trust me, you’ve never seen a movie like this before. Between director Tony Scott’s thrilling visuals, Washington’s stellar performance and a wonderfully intriguing script by Bill Marsilii and Terry Rossio, this is a very fun movie that’ll keep you guessing. Rated PG-13.

Happy Feet **

(Elijah Wood, Robin Williams, Nicole Kidman) Poor, poor Mumble (Wood). Although his parents (Kidman and Hugh Jackman) found one another through song, as all Emperor penguins do, he has a terrible singing voice and is shunned by his peers. Mumble’s musical prowess instead lies in tap dancing, which isn’t acceptable until he meets Ramon (Williams) and his four friends. There’s a little too much ecological concern for a movie that’s ostensibly a silly good time, though some impressive visual sequences and fine voice work make it tolerable. Rated PG.

Casino Royale **1/2

(Daniel Craig, Eva Green, Judi Dench) On James Bond’s (Craig) first mission, he must stop a banker named Le Chiffre (Mads Mikkelsen) from winning a poker tournament that would allow him to continue to finance terrorism all over the world. Craig has re-invented Bond with less charisma and more grittiness, making him more human (and effective) than his predecessors. His success aside, the film is unreasonably long at 144 minutes, and becomes quite tiring to sit through. Rated PG-13.

Babel ***

(Brad Pitt, Cate Blanchett, Gael García Bernal) Four storylines from different parts of the world intersect in director Alejandro Gonzalez Iñarritu and writer Guillermo Arriaga’s third collaboration after Amores Perros and 21 Grams. This time the pair don’t reach the same emotional heights, but the film is a triumph of editing and acting, particularly Pitt as a desperate husband and Adriana Barraza as Amelia, Pitt’s babysitter who foolishly takes his two children into Mexico for her son’s wedding. Kudos also go to Rinko Kikuchi as a deaf-mute teenage girl in Japan who wants nothing more than to be accepted. In the end, though, it’s hard to tell where the concurrent happenstance ends and anything meaningful begins. This is a sublime work of art signifying nothing but chance, coincidence and horrible luck. Rated R.

Stranger Than Fiction **

(Will Ferrell, Dustin Hoffman, Emma Thompson) Harold Crick (Ferrell) is a straight-laced IRS auditor who keeps hearing a strange woman’s voice in his head. For help he turns to a literature professor (Hoffman) who helps him discern that the woman’s voice is that of novelist Karen Eiffel, a reclusive writer who always kills off her leading men. Tension abounds as Harold learns he’s a character in her latest novel and must fight to stay alive. This is an example of a cool idea getting lost in its own cleverness. Sure, it’s fun to watch fiction melded with reality, but given that the movie ostensibly takes place in the real world there’s too much implausibility for it to gel. To his credit, Ferrell is very restrained as the beleaguered Crick, and the dramatic performance shows that he’s capable of more than the silliness of Talladega Nights. Rated PG-13.

Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan ***1/2

(Sacha Baron Cohen, Ken Davitian, Pamela Anderson) A television reporter from Kazakhstan named Borat Sagdiyev (Cohen) tours the U.S. in an effort to learn values and customs that can improve his native country. According to him there are three main problems in Kazakhstan: “economic, social and Jew.” Anti-Semitism is just one of the many offenses Cohen and director Larry Charles (“Curb Your Enthusiasm”) commit in this riotously-funny movie. There is no ethnicity, race, gender, sexual orientation or religious belief at which Borat doesn’t poke at least a little fun, and every time he does it it’s funnier than the last. Rated R.

The Queen ***

(Helen Mirren, Michael Sheen, James Cromwell) Newly anointed Prime Minister Tony Blair (Sheen) helps HM Queen Elizabeth II (Mirren) and the royal family look past tradition and find the needs of its people after the death of Princess Diana in 1997. Magnificent performances by Mirren and Sheen powerfully bring the centuries-old royal customs into modern times, and director Stephen Frears paces the film to show that it was mostly stubborn tradition — and not necessarily the highly speculated dislike of Diana among the royal family — that led to the monarchy appearing so distant immediately following the unthinkable tragedy. Rated PG-13.

These Reviews were posted in November 2006

Jackass Number Two ***

(Johnny Knoxville, Steve-O, Bam Margera) Knoxville and friends Steve-O, Bam, Chris, Ryan, etc. return for more heinous and dangerous stunts, most of which are done with the sole intention of amusing or degrading themselves. Here is a movie that is so awesomely juvenile and so primitively idiotic that it doesn’t take long to stop thinking it’s stupid and start laughing right along with the often hysterically funny skits. Rated R.

Half Nelson ***1/2

(Ryan Gosling, Shareeka Epps, Anthony Mackie) An eighth-grade history teacher (Gosling) forms an unlikely friendship with one of his students (Epps) after she catches him using drugs. A harrowing film of sadness and despair, highlighted by Gosling’s stellar turn and a remarkably nuanced performance by young Epps. Rated R.

Gridiron Gang **1/2

(Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, Xzibit, Jade Yorker) Probation officers (The Rock and Xzibit) at a juvenile detention center turn a group of violence-prone felons into a high school football team. The sports movie genre doesn’t allow for much creativity, and there certainly isn’t any on display here. But the performance of The Rock, combined with the likeability of the kids, makes it bearable. Rated PG-13.

Hollywoodland **

(Adrien Brody, Diane Lane, Ben Affleck) Private eye Louis Simo (Brody) investigates the 1959 death of television’s Superman (Affleck). Was it his spurned fiancé, Leonore Lemmon (Robin Tunney)? His lover’s (Diane Lane) husband, MGM Vice President Eddie Mannix (Bob Hoskins)? Or was it indeed a suicide, as concluded by the LAPD? The film doesn’t take quite as much delight in exposing the theories as it should, and therefore is rather flat and lifeless when it needs to be anything but. Rated R.

The Quiet (No Stars)

(Camilla Belle, Elisha Cuthbert, Martin Donovan) The prototypical happy American family is given a facelift with a pill-popping mom (Edie Falco) and a dad (Donovan) who sexually molests his teenage daughter (Cuthbert). Condoned pedophilia is something audiences should never have to endure, and the film is never clever enough to be either a scathing satire or searing indictment of the complacency with which we view the common family. This movie is amoral and unwatchable. Rated R.

Invincible **

(Mark Wahlberg, Greg Kinnear, Elizabeth Banks) After the Philadelphia Eagles have one of their worst seasons in franchise history in 1975, new coach Dick Vermeil (Kinnear) holds open tryouts for all comers. Enter Vince Papale (Wahlberg), who only played two years of high school football but shows enough toughness and resolve to make the team. Just about every sports cliché in the book is on display in this Disney movie, which never once has the courage to deviate from formula monotony. Papale’s true story deserves better. Rated PG.

The Illusionist **1/2

(Edward Norton, Paul Giamatti, Jessica Biel) Renowned illusionist Eisenheim (Norton) falls for his forbidden childhood sweetheart (Biel) and must evade the pesky Chief Inspector Uhl (Giamatti) in early 20th century Vienna. Have no illusions: The story is predictable, and the talented cast registers mediocre performances at best. Still, there is something intrinsically appealing about it, and the magic is fun to watch. Rated PG-13.

Only Human ***1/2

(Guillermo Toledo, Marián Aguilera, María Botto) Disaster strikes when a nice Jewish girl (Aguilera) brings her Palestinian fiancé (Toledo) home to her wacky family in Madrid. This is a delightful little comedy that transcends subtitles and is hilarious from start to finish. See it if you’re in the mood for a great laugh. Rated R.

Little Miss Sunshine ****

(Greg Kinnear, Toni Collette, Alan Arkin) The dysfunctional Hoover family takes a 700-mile road trip and nearly kills one another (literally and figuratively) along the way. This is one of the smartest, most brutally honest and side-splittingly funny movies in a long, long time, and will undoubtedly appear on many critics’ Top Ten list at the end of the year (it’ll certainly be on mine). Rated R.

World Trade Center ***1/2

(Nicolas Cage, Michael Peña, Maria Bello) The heartrending story of the last two Port Authority Police Officers (Cage and Pena) rescued from the rubble of the World Trade Center Towers on 9/11 comes to life vividly in Oliver Stone’s passionate, moving film. This is a story of great endurance and love overcoming death, and Stone directs with a simple, tactful approach that shows nothing but respect for its subject matter. Rated PG-13.

Barnyard ***

(Voices of Kevin James, Sam Elliott, Andie MacDowell) After his father dies, a young and immature cow named Otis (James) must defend his fellow animals against the evil coyotes that lurk outside the farm’s fences. It may not be as funny as this summer’s Over the Hedge, and yes we’re all getting sick of computer-generated animals, but the movie’s choice selection of pop tunes and its warmth make it fun for kids of all ages. Rated PG.

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby ***

(Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly, Gary Cole) Hotshot NASCAR driver Ricky Bobby (Ferrell) sees his career fall apart when he can’t beat a French Formula One driver named Jean Girard (Sacha Baron Cohen). This is Ferrell’s funniest since Old School and will soon become a comedy classic. Rated PG-13.

Comments? E-mail dhudak22@yahoo.com.