Murmurs 

Once upon a time a houseboat community floated here. Photo by Mitchell Zachs/MagicalPhotos.com.

“We still need to develop our brand in order to make this the world-class city that it needs to become.”

Media Buzz Kill

Miami doesn’t need the Super Bowl to get into the national spotlight. All that’s required is a public meeting hosted by the media-savvy, and media-hungry, Miami Commissioner Tomas Regalado about where to host crowds of celebrating Cuban exiles when Fidel Castro finally decides to die. The suggestion to use the city-owned Orange Bowl as the kinda-sorta designated “Yaaaaay, Castro’s Dead” party zone inspired some fun headlines. From FOXNews.com: “Miami Plans Castro Death Party in Orange Bowl.” From CNN.com: “When Castro Dies, Miami Will Party Like It’s 1959.” And from the Miami Herald: “When Castro Dies, Party’s On.”

Perhaps fearing the whole “Miami is a Third World country” reaction from the Northeast, or a setback in trade negotiations between various South Florida cities and the oligarch Communist Party of China, or just feeling that officially sanctioning a celebration for even a dictator’s death is a tad morbid, Miami officials (cough! Mayor Manny Diaz) feared negative backlash.

And so the hardworking city of Miami spokesperson Kelly Penton issued a statement (bolds are Murmurs’): “In light of the most recent report in the Miami Herald titled ‘When Castro Dies, The Party’s On,’ it is the City’s intention to set the record straight. At no time has the City of Miami agreed to be the organizer and/or sponsor of any event coordinating a party to celebrate Fidel Castro’s death. However, the City is taking any and all necessary precautions to be prepared should any demonstrations or street crowding occur. … Specifically, the Orange Bowl has been designated by the County, as well as the City of Miami, as a possible site for people and community leaders to gather peacefully, if necessary. As such, no City tax dollars will be spent on this event other than to address public safety needs. The City’s administration will continue to plan and ensure that the community is provided a venue to be able to express themselves in a safe and appropriate environment.”

Sigh. Way to take the fun out of a media blitz, city of Miami.

Marketing Downtown

Speaking of public image, the Downtown Development Authority’s Executive Director Dana Nottingham apparently believes the city of Miami has an “amazing brand.” This is according to Cristina Raecke, the DDA’s marketing director.

“On an international level, whether you say ‘Miami’ in Bali or in London, people know who you are,” she recently told Murmurs.

Nottingham himself was not available for comment, so Raecke expounded on the ongoing “branding” process that the city and the DDA have undertaken. Turns out they want to forge a true identity for this town (no joke!) and help expedite the realization of an ambitious vision for downtown Miami. Gone would be the endless construction, tacky kitsch retailers and desolate streets, all replaced by a stimulating environment of sidewalk cafes on Biscayne Boulevard; flashy high-rises; pedestrian-friendly, tree-lined streets; and respectable shops, anchored by a cultural oasis called Museum Park (where the Miami Art Museum and the Museum of Science would be relocated).

“Development-wise, we’re in our infancy stages,” said Raecke, “and we still need to develop our brand in order to make this the world-class city that it needs to become.”

Which is why the DDA — “a public-private non-profit business organization [founded in 1965] that strives to develop Miami's downtown area as the most livable urban center in America,” according to its Web site — has been hashing out ideas with Beber Silverstein, an ad and PR agency that just completed a marketing plan for the area, which includes Brickell, the Central Business District, Park West, and the “Media & Entertainment District.”

“One of the most significant parts of Beber’s work is all of the research that they have done,” explained Raecke. “We met with almost 40 downtown stakeholders — anyone from the American Airlines Arena to the Miami Art Museum to retailers to property owners — plus we had focus groups made up of residents and we looked at other cities’ downtown areas like Vancouver, Chicago and Austin.”

Now, Raecke continued, the DDA has put out a Request for Proposals (RFP) seeking creative and marketing firms to implement Beber’s recommendations and suggest new ones. Proposals are due by 5 p.m. Monday, Feb. 5, and applications can be downloaded at www.miamidda.com. 

“The idea is to start with an overarching brand — an umbrella brand, if you will — and then there will be all the sub-districts,” Raecke said. “As people move in, they will make the neighborhoods into what they want.

“We’re targeting several different markets,” she added, “residents, businesses, employees, and we have different strategies for all of them, but the main purpose is to promote downtown and keep residents in here that already live here. The plan is to build, retain and expand.”

Problem is, downtown Miami’s development is still, indeed, at its dawn — Museum Park is a hopeful yet still far-flung concept, with the new Miami Art Museum only in its preliminary design stages; the once-speculative real estate market leaves one wondering who will be living in all the new shiny skyscrapers; and, well, at this point, it is hard to imagine that walking through downtown Miami will ever be a pleasant experience. Plus, of course, there is the seemingly inexorable traffic problem.

Raecke, however, remains positive.

“The Miami DDA is working with all the important stakeholders, including city and state agencies, to tackle traffic and other issues,” she said. “One of our main challenges is to change the perception of people and get them to start walking more, like in New York. We’re looking at how to make that happen — sidewalks, crosswalks and everything.”

A Community Gone

The houseboat community of North Bay Village is officially no more — at least for a while. As a lot of Miami-Dadians know, Hurricane Wilma unleashed unholy hell on the fragile floating houseboat/live-aboard community in NBV a couple of years ago. What a lot of us don’t know is that while many houses and vessels were sunk or torn to pieces, quite a few homes escaped the carnage the wind and brackish-sea caused. Among them was the home of controversial activist/former Marine/software engineer Fane Lozman. Lozman later had to ferry his home far away from NBV in what he felt was some sort of conspiracy by city officials to remove him. (Lozman is now tormenting the political establishment of the Palm Beach County community of Riviera Beach.)

But, as it turned out, all the homes left afloat in the two marinas — not just Lozman’s — would have to relocate. Paul Gioia, North Bay Village’s chief building official, said the storm mangled the marinas so badly that the state’s Department of Environmental Protection required they be rebuilt before any vessels can be tied there again. And so, as of last Thursday, the last vessel — what was left of a sailboat — was taken away, leaving the tattered remains of Bayshore Yacht and Tennis Court Marina, Gator Harbor West Marina and an open bay.

Gioia said the process of permitting a rebuilt marina, as mandated by the state, will be long. Still, Gioia hopes the houseboats return. “They are part of our heritage.”

House Calls

Code compliance officers paid a visit to the Pine Tree Drive home of socialite and Social Affair magazine publisher Norma Quintero a couple of weeks ago. They were there for the Chanel fashion show and luncheon Quintero hosted, but they weren’t there to enjoy the event, eat, converse, hang with the invited society-types and models or make a donation to the charities such events benefit like the Vizcayans or Jackson Memorial Hospital Sylvester Cancer Center. They were there to issue her a citation.

Some background: The city of Miami Beach is currently warring with homeowners who use their houses as for-profit clubs. The city is even moving forward with an ordinance that not only clarifies that such operations are illegal in single-family districts, but also requires that those who use their homes for charity fundraising purposes offer certified proof of said charity and provide some kind of parking plan. Meanwhile, code officers continue pursuing for-profit house parties using existing laws. Needless to say, those agents will be having a ball this Super Bowl weekend.

And as a warm-up act, Murmurs heard that they decided to interrogate Quintero. Code compliance officers asked her if she was renting the place or owned it and if she was pocketing any of the money in the operation. Attempts to reach the Miami Beach Code Compliance Department were in vain, but according to Gary Arzt, a friend of Quintero and business development director at Social Affairs, no citation was issued.

Arzt later read a statement from Quintero: “Instead of dealing with the people who are breaking the noise ordinance … the commission is trying to tell all homeowners who they can have as guests to their homes. We don’t need new intrusive [ordinances] …. We have laws that need to be enforced and commissioners should just drop this useless and superfluous ordinance.”

Arzt offered his own independent commentary to Murmurs: “These people are fuckwads. It’s as if we live in Nazi Germany.”

Incidentally, the house party ordinance has not yet passed.

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