Episode 17:
Seasoning
By Lee Molloy
For our
reality series Make Me the President, we scoured the country to
find the most power-hungry, Machiavellian and downright
unattractive people in the United States of America (“The
Greatest Nation On Earth” ™) to find the man, or woman, who
could raise the most money, be willing to break the most
promises and offer the most bland reason to become — The
President.
Last week on
MMTP:
After asking
which Scripture Sen. Barack “Who’s sane?” Obama was referring to
in a forum a couple of weeks back when he said, “Scripture
talks about clinging to what's good,” Ms. Carolyn Klepser
ventured that it may have been Philippians 4:8. MMTP
producers disagreed, pointing out that that verse didn’t ring
quite true with Obama’s comment. So, this week Ms. Klepser (who
declares herself “not an Obama supporter”) is back with
Romans 12:9. Okay, let’s take a look: The New International
Version of the Bible translates this verse as “Love must be
sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.” Well,
congratulations Carolyn, it seems you have solved the mystery.
Your prize? Hmmm, how about a brighter tomorrow and a new dawn
in our democracy?
Also, last
week, MMTP producers took Obama to task, yet again, over
the Rev. Jeremiah Wright. Some people criticized us for
returning to this topic, saying it was tabloid journalism and
irrelevant. Well, after the events of this week, those people
can kiss….
This week on
MMTP:
Although we
don’t purport to have the qualifications of say, Dr. Phil,
MMTP producers believe that we can now officially declare
that all Team Democrats fans are totally out of their
pansy-assed, liberal minds. Team Democrats fans seem to
have forgotten a very important fact about MMTP — the
goal of the game is not to beat the other player on your team;
it is, in fact, to beat the player from the other team.
Which, in case y’all have forgotten, is Sen. John “Captain
America” McCain.
Let’s recap:
The Team Democrats nomination looked like it was going to be
Sen. Hillary “Rocky” Clinton this year. Her political machine
was in place, the money was lined up and the country was in such
a mess that it seemed impossible a Team Republicans contestant
could be successful. Then, along came the rock star Obama.
“Articulate and clean” (as Sen. Joe Biden would say), he brought
something new and exciting to the political arena — a promise of
change, “the audacity of hope.”
That was when
something unusual happened: The mainstream media, along with
Hollywood stars and the endearingly naïve, followed in the
footsteps of that chick from YouTube and got a crush on Obama, a
crush way beyond fandom — this went into the realms of psycho
stalkerdom. The media turned a blind eye to his mistakes,
starlets cooed “yes we can” in music videos and young people
rallied and worshiped him like he was the second coming of
Christ himself.
So, what?
Well,
somewhere along the line, people forgot to do their homework.
Spin it whichever way makes you happy, but the bottom line is
that Obama is not a regular poor black kid from a broken home.
He grew up in places the average person only dreams of visiting,
such as Hawaii and Indonesia. His single mother was a
smart, independent woman who eventually got a Ph.D. And Obama
went to college in Los Angeles and New York City, graduated from
Harvard Law and had a talent for writing self-aggrandizing books
before running for public office.
He may not
have grown up rich — he may even have struggled to pay the rent
on occasion — but he sure has been privileged. In America, we
know that the privilege of opportunity can be the most profound
freedom a person can have. However, it is privilege, in part,
that is starting to cause Obama problems.
First, he
joined the church of the Rev. Wright. Obama could have joined
any church he liked, but he joined Trinity United Church of
Christ. Why would a young man of privilege and ambition who had
grown up, culturally speaking, mostly white want to go to a
church as culturally black as he could find? Was he on some
quest, perhaps, to find the demographic that everyone wanted to
put him into?
Obama learned
much from Wright; he learned his Scriptures, he learned to build
ministries, he learned to give a good speech and through the
network of his church, he learned something of regular black
family life in America. Lately, Wright has taught him another
valuable lesson: Many politically charged preachers are peacocks
that like nothing better than the sound of their own voices.
And, eventually peacocks, like chickens, come home to roost.
Second, Obama
grew up almost entirely outside of the contiguous United States
and, therefore, really has no more idea of what it is to be a
regular American than Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, who is not a
natural-born citizen and, therefore, is ineligible for the
presidency. Obama had a privileged, multicultural upbringing and
lived in such cosmopolitan cities as New York, Los Angeles and
Chicago. Through his church, Obama gained a better understanding
of the black vote. The white, rural and working-class Americans,
with whom he basically had no contact, have been more difficult
for him to connect with. And that is why he got it so wrong with
the Bittergate comment. Let’s stay out of the spin zone — Obama
meant what he said about clinging to guns and religion, not
because he is a bad person, but because he simply doesn’t
understand what it is to be part of that America.
If we look at
Obama’s constituency so far, it has consisted of blacks and
white, middle-class city folks and suburbanites. The general
election cannot be won with only these constituents. Team
Democrats’ nominee will need the white, working poor and
middle-class, rural voters, and they will need them in the big
states that Sen. Clinton keeps winning.
So, why is
Clinton being made out to be the bad gal? Don’t Team Democrats
fans realize that if she didn’t fight as hard as she does, Obama
would win the nomination and walk onto the general election
battlefield unbloodied and totally unprepared for what is to
come? Clinton has been taking it easy compared to what Team
Republicans would certainly do.
These are
campaigns, and politics is a war of words. Let’s be honest:
Obama screwed up, he couldn’t handle Wright and, now, he looks
bad because of it. Clinton didn’t do that to him; he did it to
himself.
It’s the same
with the Bittergate comments. The man said it and then tried to
spin out of it by quoting an elusive Scripture, but, again, this
is politics and Obama is, according to the Rev. Wright, a
politician.
Fans must
decide if they want to be waving to Team Democrats’ president on
Air Force One or to John McCain. If it is the former, then the
choice they must make is not whom they prefer, but who can win.
This week, it seems a little less likely to be Obama. Tune in
after the North Carolina and Indiana primaries next week to find
out if Sen. Obama has what it takes to get back up.
Hail to the
Chief!
